Connect with us

Queerica: Life after Obama and the Future of Straight Supremacy

Published

on

Chivas Sandage takes the readers of the New Civil Right Movement on a tour of an ascendantly queer America in 2013 post Barack Obama’s re-election

This is a guest post by Chivas Sandage, a new contributor to The New Civil Rights Movement.

My wife, daughter, and I were eating quesadillas while musing about future historians and how they’ll look back on the Republican Party’s opposition to our family structure when my teenager asked what superpower I’d choose if I could choose just one. I felt torn between going backward or forward in time, but later, as I drifted off to sleep, I wished to see the future and know just what President Obama’s second term and ultimate legacy will mean for my country—and family. As I fell into dream, I saw a tall, dark-cloaked figure whose face was concealed. A gaunt black hand emerged, pointing toward the bedroom window.

I recognized at once the Ghost of America Yet to Come. I looked into the window where that bony hand pointed.  In the morning, I woke from what felt like one hundred years of dreaming in a single night. Dear reader, I feel pressed to report what I saw come to pass.

With Obama’s reelection, the Defense of Marriage Act became known as the Defense of Straight Supremacy Act (DOSSA) and was quickly dumped. Liberals throughout the nation celebrated. Christian fundamentalist protestors filled the streets but then retreated as gay orgies bloomed in broad daylight on every street in America. Heterosexual couples immediately felt the effects of DOSSA’s collapse and their marriages began to disintegrate with the sheer force of erotic energy in the air and water supply. Closeted homosexuals left their marriages in droves. Many heterosexuals divorced because the institution was no longer “sacred” now that they had to check the same box on forms as their LGBTQQIA colleagues and neighbors, not to mention family members they’d shunned or disowned.

Obama made the landmark decision to come out of the closet and announced that both he and Michelle were gay. Like so many, theirs was a marriage of convenience. While Democrats were disappointed to see the first family separate, no one was surprised. Finally, there was a politically correct explanation for Barack’s ability to dance and Michelle’s biceps. Barack became the first gay single father President and Michelle the first lesbian First Lady. After their divorce, Michelle and the girls (and Bo) continued to live in the White House while Barack rented a studio apartment a short commute away. Michelle eventually remarried Rachel Maddow and the first daughters had two moms. Barack remarried Chris Rock (after he also came out) and the first daughters had two dads.

As each year passed, Obama’s legacy ensured that the homosexual agenda to take over the nation and then the world gained momentum. Homosexuals entered a new era of enjoying basic human civil rights while wielding maximum political power. By coincidence, the Senate and Congress were both 100 percent gay when the United States of America was renamed the United States of Queerica.

When Obama passed the baton, he once again made history. A fat activist, Islamic Fundamentalist, Cadillac-driving welfare recipient who was equal parts African-American, Cuban, Vietnamese, Jewish, Palestinian, Native-American, Italian, and Unknown Origin who identified as a stone butch LGBTQQIA single mother of four children (from four sperm donors) became President of the United States of Queerica.

With the election of President Quintasia Hussein Minh Castro Mussolini Laughing-Fox, Donna2there was a brief bubble of controversy when it was proven that President Laughing-Fox was not an American Citizen but born in an underground bunker in Abbottabad, Pakistan. After several sex scandals occupied the liberal media’s attention, the small matter of a citizenship requirement was quickly forgotten and a new age of gay supremacy strutted into existence. A mate to the Statue of Liberty was erected: Donna Summer holding a microphone above her head.

With the passage of DOMA II, heterosexual marriage became illegal in the USQ. Marriages of sixty years or sixty minutes were annulled, leaving couples and their families in legal limbo. Formerly known as “spouses,” these pairs of unrelated individuals were awkwardly referred to as “friends.” Domestic partnership status was not an option under DOMA II and “friends” were not eligible to share each other’s health insurance benefits, had to file taxes as “single” and no longer qualified for lower rates. A “friend” in the ER or hospital was rarely allowed visits from non-family members—even if seriously ill, injured, or dying. In the event of death, a mourning “friend” was not eligible for the other’s social security benefits and was forced to pay estate taxes on the home they shared.

The military—which only allowed butch lesbians to serve in close-combat units—re-instituted “Don’t Ask Don’t Tell,” further oppressing opposite-sex military families who were suddenly forced to hide their relationships on paper and at the water cooler, on the street and at the military ball. Maiden names were reclaimed and wedding rings slid off. Even the youngest children of straight parents were taught not to talk about their parents, and if forced, to avoid using gender specific terms.

In the good old USQ, a handful of stubborn southern states refused to abide by the federally enforced straight marriage ban and so National Guard troops were sent to ensure compliance. Riots erupted and confederate flags reproduced like rabbits in mixed crowds with non-violent, placard carrying catholic priests marching in solidarity with gun-carrying, pro-secession rednecks, conservative upper middle-class corporate sector professionals, the Trumpsters (merchant protesters paid by the nearly dead Donald), and Mormon missionaries leading the way. The National Guard used tear gas and rubber bullets to disperse the crowds. Interestingly enough, Catholic nuns didn’t protest; they were focused on promoting the spread of communism in Queerica, which had smoothly transitioned to socialism by the end of Obama’s reign in the newly christened Black House. Coincidentally, Spanish became Queerica’s official language when all forms of protest became illegal.

Gay supremacy reigned supreme. The plight of heterosexual people was of little concern to the majority of Queericans who considered straight issues a diversion from more important debates such as whether to sell crack in public school vending machines. Liberals always found a way to either trivialize or demonize straight issues. Gay supremacists claimed that angry, activist heterosexuals were a danger to society and unfit to work with children in any capacity. In fact, “heterosexual” quickly became synonymous with “pedophile.”

President Laughing-Fox refused to soften her stance against opposite-sex marriage. For many years, a few southern states allowed heterosexuals to have “Civil Unions” but this caused bitter disagreement across Queerica and created legal complications for these couples once they traveled across state lines. The media bombarded the public with slanted news stories, radio talk shows, and polls about whether straights should have marriage rights. Endless debates placed the personal lives and families of heterosexuals on public display 24/7. Those who voiced complaints were labeled as radicals.

Gay-PrideNYCOne by one, northern states passed laws making it illegal to have heterosexual intercourse, paving the way for a constitutional amendment that made in vitro fertilization the only way to procreate legally. “Friends” could be arrested if neighbors suspected they might be having heterosexual intercourse. Straights caught pursuing their sexual deviations were forced to participate in therapeutic cures. Straight bars became illegal but persisted in some red light districts in Mississippi. Youth who exhibited heterosexual characteristics were bullied in schools across the nation, especially northern states.

Heterosexuals worked hard to pass for gay—adopting new names, styles, gaits, and mannerisms. In order to compete for jobs, many attended “polishing” schools where even the most stubborn straight men could be turned into divas. Straight men also learned the art of negotiating unwanted attention from hard-muscled gay men who took a fancy to them, finding that ever-delicate balance between massaging the male ego by acting appreciative while  appearing not quite available yet to avoid inciting sexual harassment, rape, or other physical violence against themselves. Privileges that het men had always taken for granted—like walking down the street alone after dark—were no longer possible unless they had a stone butch bull dyke at their side when the low spark of high-heeled boys lit up the night.

The King Barack Bible traced humans back to the moment Ada and Eve took mutual responsibility for devouring a fig as part of an erotic pagan ritual. Moreover, every Disney princess fell in love with a drag queen or king. In time, it became common for an adult heterosexual to reach middle age or even go through an entire life without having ever kissed a person of the opposite sex.

At the end of the dream, I was watching a 4th of July parade on Main Street in Lubbock, Texas.  It could have been a New York City Pride parade from the early 21st century. There were marching bands with husky dykes carrying tubas and drums while the “girls” played their flutes. I gazed across the cheering, crowded streets filled with Queerican flag-waving comrades celebrating our new global role as ruler of The United Nations of Queerica. Most could not remember when straights had civil rights. In fact, most Queericans had never studied history—it was no longer taught in the schools. Instead, they studied Queerstory.

As always, the fags and a few token femmes stole the parade with their skimpy, gold-sequined leotards and shining batons. Yes, Lubbock was as Queerican as fig pie.

Images of the USA gay flag and gay pride ballon display, courtesy of photo bucket. Image of Donna Summer courtesy of Wikipedia.

Author picChivas Sandage is the author of Hidden Drive, a first book of poetry, recently published by Antrim House in August 2012. Her essays and poems are forthcoming or recently appeared in Drunken Boat, Evergreen Review, The Hartford Courant, Knockout Magazine, Naugatuck River Review, Paradise Found (Levellers Press, ’12), and Morning Song: Poems for New Parents (St. Martin’s Press, ’11). Her work has also appeared in the Artful Dodge, Hampshire Life Magazine, Ms. Magazine, Upstreet, Manthology: Poems on the Male Experience (Univ. of Iowa Press, ‘06), andSame-Sex Marriage: The Moral and Legal Debate (Prometheus Books, ‘04). She has taught at Westfield State University and earned an MFA in Writing from Vermont College of Fine Arts and a BA from Bennington College. She lives in Connecticut with her wife and daughter. Her blog is http://www.csandage.com.

Related Topics:
Continue Reading
Click to comment
 
 

Enjoy this piece?

… then let us make a small request. The New Civil Rights Movement depends on readers like you to meet our ongoing expenses and continue producing quality progressive journalism. Three Silicon Valley giants consume 70 percent of all online advertising dollars, so we need your help to continue doing what we do.

NCRM is independent. You won’t find mainstream media bias here. From unflinching coverage of religious extremism, to spotlighting efforts to roll back our rights, NCRM continues to speak truth to power. America needs independent voices like NCRM to be sure no one is forgotten.

Every reader contribution, whatever the amount, makes a tremendous difference. Help ensure NCRM remains independent long into the future. Support progressive journalism with a one-time contribution to NCRM, or click here to become a subscriber. Thank you. Click here to donate by check.

News

Johnson Goes After Nearly Non-Existent Non-Citizen Voting

Published

2 hours ago

on

May 8, 2024

By

Speaker of the House Mike Johnson is promoting new legislation to make it illegal for non-U.S. citizens to vote in federal elections, despite an existing law that does just that.

After his joint press conference last month with ex-president Donald Trump on “election integrity,” the embattled Speaker is teaming up with former top Trump official Stephen Miller, the architect of the previous administration’s family separation policy that led to thousands of immigrant children being ripped apart from their parents and siblings. Other Trump orbit guests present included Cleta Mitchell, Ken Cuccinelli, and Hogan Gidley (full video below).

Johnson, now fending off a small but loud faction of his conference threatening to oust him, on Wednesday held a press event on the steps of the U.S. Capitol to promote his Safeguard American Voter Eligibility (SAVE) Act.

READ MORE: ‘Scratch Off the Georgia Trial’: Second Trump Case Likely Delayed Past Election Experts Say

“We all know, intuitively, that a lot of illegals are voting in federal elections. But it’s not been something that’s easily provable. We don’t have that number,” Johnson falsely told reporters.

Commenting on Johnson’s remarks that  “intuitively” we know that “a lot of illegals are voting,” Michael Waldman, president of the Brennan Center for Justice at NYU School of Law, wrote: “It’s already very, very illegal. Many systems in place. Punishment including jail or deportation. That Cleta Mitchell, a conspirator (on ‘find 11,000 votes’ call) & Stephen Miller stood there says it all. It’s the Big Lie in legislative form.”

The Associated Press last month also reported on non-citizen voting.

“There isn’t any indication that noncitizens vote in significant numbers in federal elections or that they will in the future. It’s already a crime for them to do so. And we know it’s not a danger because various states have examined their rolls and found very few noncitizen voters.”

Calling “cases of noncitizens casting ballots…extremely rare,” the AP added: “Those who have looked into these cases say they often involve legal immigrants who mistakenly believe they have the right to vote.”

READ MORE: ‘Rejection of Trump’: 1 in 5 Indiana GOP Voters Just Cast Their Ballot for Nikki Haley

Johnson, standing in front of a “small handful of Republicans,” said his legislation “will prevent” undocumented immigrants from voting, “and if someone tries to do it, it will now be unlawful,” he added, despite a decades-old law that already makes it illegal.

“If a nefarious actor wants to intervene in our elections all they have to do is check a box on a form and sign their name, that’s it, that’s all that’s required,” Johnson continued, while not disclosing known facts.

“It’s a federal crime for noncitizens to vote in federal elections,” the Brennan Center for Justice reported last month. “It’s also a crime under every state’s laws. In fact, under federal law, you could face up to five years in prison simply for registering to vote. It’s also a deportable offense for noncitizens to register or vote. And sure, people make bad decisions and commit crimes all the time. But this one is different: by committing the crime, you create a government record of your having committed it. In fact, it’s the creation of the government record — the registration form or the ballot cast — that is the crime. So, you’ve not only exposed yourself to prison time and deportation, you’ve put yourself on the government’s radar, and you’ve handed the government the evidence it needs to put you in prison or deport you. All so you could cast one vote. Who would do such a thing?”

Johnson went on to falsely claim that “Joe Biden has welcomed millions and millions of illegal aliens – we think the number, I believe the number is probably close to at this point 16 million illegals who have come into this country since Joe Biden walked into the Oval Office.”

Claiming there are “sophisticated criminal syndicates and agents of adversarial governments, here, in our borders, and even on humanitarian parole,” Johnson said: “And that means the millions that have been paroled can simply go to their local welfare office or the DMV, and register to vote here.”

Aaron Reichlin-Melnick, the policy director for the American Immigration Council, noted, “multiple state governments have engaged in large-scale efforts in recent years to find evidence of noncitizen voting, and in every single case haven’t been able to find more than a tiny handful of cases, usually a few dozen or less, spread out over years.”

Watch the full video of Speaker Johnson’s event below and clips above, or all at this link.

READ MORE: ‘This Isn’t Justice’: Legal Experts Blast Cannon for Postponing Trump Case Indefinitely

 

Continue Reading

News

‘Scratch Off the Georgia Trial’: Second Trump Case Likely Delayed Past Election Experts Say

Published

4 hours ago

on

May 8, 2024

By

The Georgia Court of Appeals has agreed to take up Donald Trump’s appeal of a lower court’s ruling allowing Fulton County District Attorney Fani Willis to remain on the case in her RICO prosecution of the ex-president for election interference.

Legal experts were quick to declare this will delay the trial so far that it’s likely it will not take place before the November election. The news comes less than one day after U.S. District Judge Aileen Cannon, a Trump appointee, announced she was postponing the Espionage Act/classified documents trial indefinitely.

Professor of law, MSNBC/NBC News legal analyst Joyce Vance posted the Georgia court’s order and her initial response.

“You can scratch off the Georgia trial too now. That’s not happening before the election either,” declared national security attorney Brad Moss.

READ MORE: ‘Rejection of Trump’: 1 in 5 Indiana GOP Voters Just Cast Their Ballot for Nikki Haley

“It is entirely possible that the Manhattan case is the only one that makes it to verdict before the election,” Moss added, pointing to the current falsification of business records, hush money, and election interference case prosecuted by Manhattan District Attorney Alvin Bragg.

“Georgia and the MAL docs cases are almost certainly delayed at this point,” he continued, referring to the Mar-a-Lago Espionage Act/classified documents case. “The DC election fraud case hinges on how and when SCOTUS rules. It is possible but by no means certain that the Fall campaign could see that trial take place. Or it could remain bogged down in legal fights too.”

Georgia State University College of Law constitutional law professor Anthony Michael Kreis put it bluntly: “There will be no Georgia trial before 2025. Period. Full stop.”

But he also offered more insight.

“It’ll be a summer of Willis and Wade,” wrote Kreis, referring to Willis’ special prosecutor Nathan Wade, who had a romantic relationship with Willis and resigned after a judge ruled Willis could remain on the case if she corrected certain issues. “Whether the appeals court is more interested in the relationship and the underlying conflict claim or the issue of forensic misconduct over the church speech Willis made in response to the disqualification motion— or both— remains to be seen.”

READ MORE: Trump Threatens to Violate Gag Order and Go to Jail: ‘I’ll Do That Sacrifice Any Day’

But Kreis also attempted to tamp down negative reaction to the Georgia Appeals Court’s decision.

“For everyone complaining about the Fulton County case appeal, let me just say that our Georgia Court of Appeals has incredibly smart, hard-working, and serious judges. They are good and decent folks by and large. So cool it on your hot takes and conspiracy theories there.”

Meanwhile, former federal prosecutor of 30 years, Glenn Kirschner offers some small hope to those wanting to see the trial move forward.

“Judge McAfee said the case will keep moving forward EVEN IF the appeals court grants review,” Kirschner wrote.

Judge McAfee vowed to “continue addressing the many other unrelated pending pretrial motions, regardless of whether the petition is granted within 45 days of filing, and even if any subsequent appeal is expedited by the appellate court.”

READ MORE: ‘This Isn’t Justice’: Legal Experts Blast Cannon for Postponing Trump Case Indefinitely

 

Continue Reading

News

‘Rejection of Trump’: 1 in 5 Indiana GOP Voters Just Cast Their Ballot for Nikki Haley

Published

6 hours ago

on

May 8, 2024

By

Nikki Haley dropped out of the 2024 presidential race exactly two months ago, and yet on Tuesday 128,000 Indiana GOP primary voters cast their ballot for the former Trump UN Ambassador instead of the presumptive Republican nominee.

“Unexpected warning signs for Trump in busy Indiana primary,” reports Politico, which notes, “Nikki Haley’s performance in the already concluded presidential race could be a sign of trouble for Trump in more competitive states.”

Haley, also a former South Carolina governor, was consistently getting double-digit percentages of the GOP primary vote before she dropped out of the race, even in red states. (All vote totals and percentages are from the Associated Press via Google and are current as of time of publication.)

In Alabama, Haley took 13%. In Oklahoma, 15.9%. In Texas, 17.4%. Tennessee, 19.5%.

READ MORE: ‘This Isn’t Justice’: Legal Experts Blast Cannon for Postponing Trump Case Indefinitely

But after Haley dropped out, effectively handing Trump the nomination, Republican primary voters continued to vote for her, and continued to vote for her almost always in double-digit percentages.

In Arizona, Haley won 17.8% of the primary vote. In Georgia, 13.2%. In Kansas, 16.1%.

And last night in Indiana, Haley took 21.7% of the vote.

It’s not just solidly “red” states.

In New Hampshire, Haley won a whopping 43.2% 0f the GOP primary vote.

Tuesday night as the Indiana results were still coming in but pretty much solidified, David Nir, publisher of Daily Kos Elections, asked, “Is Nikki Haley getting *more* popular? Right now, she’s at 21.6% in Indiana with more than 70% reporting. If it holds, that would be her best showing since dropping out after Super Tuesday.”

Sarah Longwell, publisher of The Bulwark, replied, “No. It doesn’t have much at all to do with Nikki Haley. It’s that the broadest coalition in American politics is the anti-Trump coalition.”

READ MORE: Johnson Demands All Trump Prosecutions Cease, Vows to Use Congress ‘In Every Possible Way’

Amanda Carpenter, a Republican political commentator who once worked for far-right GOP lawmakers including Senators Ted Cruz and Jim DeMint, agrees with the anti-Trump theory.

“It’s almost as if…more and more Republicans, each day, are rejecting Trump. Perhaps these [Indiana] voters heard what their former congressman and Governor and later Vice President Mike Pence had to say about the president he served?” she wrote. “In all seriousness though, this is not a Nikki Haley movement showing up in double digits in multiple states. It’s anti-Trump GOP voters. Can you hear them yet? This is real.”

The New York Times last month took a look at what is called the “zombie vote,” votes for candidates who have already dropped out.

According to the Times, the “zombie vote in this year’s Republican primary has actually been low by historical standards. In Democratic and Republican primaries going back to 2000, roughly a quarter of voters picked a candidate other than the eventual nominee even after all the other serious contenders had exited the race.”

READ MORE: Trump Threatens to Violate Gag Order and Go to Jail: ‘I’ll Do That Sacrifice Any Day’

“For Mr. Trump,” the Times adds, “what matters is how many of Ms. Haley’s primary voters will rally behind him come November. Polls have shown that her supporters are likely to say they will vote for Mr. Biden. Even so, those same polls often find that many of those voters already supported Mr. Biden in 2020.”

The Nation’s John Nichols last month pointed to just that, after the Pennsylvania primary:

“Haley is not campaigning, but she just won almost 158,000 GOP primary votes in the critical state of Pennsylvania. Democrats think they can swing many of them to Biden.”

Late Tuesday night, pointing to Haley taking more than a third of the vote in some Indiana counties, Nichols concluded, “These numbers continue a pattern of rejection of Donald Trump by precisely the Republicans and Republican-leaning independents he needs in November.”

Continue Reading

Trending

Copyright © 2020 AlterNet Media.