'Think of It as Going to Conversion Therapy to Turn Yourself in to Someone Who's No Longer a Candidate'
This week's Saturday Night Live cold open featured "Mike Pence" telling "Roy Moore" he should quit the Senate race, with "Jeff Sessions" popping up to convince him.
"I don't have to tell you that the Senate hangs in the balance," Pence, played by Beck Bennett told Moore, played by Mikey Day. "We're trying to pass a tax-reform plan this year to bring Mr. Trump's list of big legislative accomplishments to one. We can't lose your seat this December. I know you're Bannon's guy but this latest news about you is concerning. Voters in Alabama will never elect someone who's had relations with a minor."
"You sure about that?" Moore responded.
"No. Alabama is quite a place. But we can't take chances," Pence insisted.
"I want you to think of stepping aside," Pence told Moore. "Don't think of it as ending your campaign, think of it as going to conversion therapy to turn yourself in to someone who's no longer a candidate."
Later, Jeff Sessions, played by Kate McKinnon, comes out to finish the job.
"Roy, you've been doing some controversial stuff," Mckinnon's Sessions says. "You wave a gun around on stage, tell folks Muslims shouldn't be allowed in Congress, and that 9/11 was God's punishment for sodomy. I love it. You check a lot of boxes for me," Sessions says, grinning.
"I'm usually the creepiest one in the room, but I look at you, and I'm like, 'Oh my God,'" Sessions admits. "I'm Alabama but you, you sir, are too Alabama. Get out, get on and let me get to my gerrymandering."
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