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Watch: Rick Santorum Tells Stephen Colbert Same-Sex Marriage Is ‘Short Of What Is Best’

by David Badash on November 20, 2013

in Marriage,News,Politics

Post image for Watch: Rick Santorum Tells Stephen Colbert Same-Sex Marriage Is ‘Short Of What Is Best’

It’s cold outside. The holidays are coming up fast. So it’s time to reach into the closet and trot out those old decorations and things that help us remember the past. Like Rick Santorum.

Rick Santorum, ladies and gentlemen, is the past. His ideas are from a past that never really was, and when he “left” the Senate, the people of Pennsylvania tried to make sure he never came back. Which is why practically no one voted for him.

Sadly, Santorum didn’t get the message, so he keeps trying to share his message with you.

Fortunately, we have Stephen Colbert to mock him ruthlessly.

Santorum is now the head of a religious movie studio and he’s out pushing their holiday film, “The Christmas Candle.”

The failed GOP presidential candidate went on “The Colbert Report” last night and talked about the film, if he’s running in 2016, and, of course, same-sex marriage and that whole, ugly, “man on dog” thing that, he says, was “sort of a little taken out of context.”

“Marriage,” Santorum tells Colbert, “has devolved just into a romantic relationship between two people and that’s not what marriage is.”

“Heterosexuals have lost the definition of marriage and so it’s not surprising that other people want to see — ‘well, this is what marriage is today and so we should be involved in that.’”

So, modern heterosexual marriage is a dangerous slippery slope to same-sex marriage!

“What if we cut bait on it?,” Colbert asks. “It’s a neighborhood that’s gone to seed. We just leave the keys to marriage out front and we go get something better. Gays you can have marriage because at this point, marriage kind of seems gay. Little gay. And we get something better.”

“That’s sort of the argument I’m making,” Santorum says — even though, it’s not.

By the way, notice how uncomfortable with letting loose Santorum is. Probably had something to do with Colbert sarcastically calling same-sex marriage, “the rainbow train to Hell Town.”

“I’ve heard some disturbing news that gay people have children,” Colbert says, mocking Santorum. “I’ve heard some places they can even adopt children.”

“Here’s what I would say to that,” Santorum replies. “Every child has the right to their natural mother and father. Every child has a natural mother and father and they have a right to that mother and father to give them what only a mother and only a father can give.”

“What if they don’t have a mother or a father? Wouldn’t it be better for them to have no parents than to be loved by two gay people?,” Colbert snarks.

“The point of the law is to encourage what is best,” Santorum insists, “to set a standard for what is best, not to set a standard short of what is best, because when you do that you get less of what is necessary.”

Of course, Rick Santorum would like to nominate Rick Santorum to decide “what is best,” and to insist that there’s only one “best.”

Next on Santorum’s list? Eugenics?

 

The Colbert Report
Get More: Colbert Report Full Episodes,Video Archive

Hat tip and transcript: Queerty

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{ 5 comments }

ostracario November 20, 2013 at 9:44 am

Santorum obviously didn't get the memo that gluttony is an ABOMINATION!

futiledemocracy November 20, 2013 at 9:52 am

"For the sake of having children".
I feel sorry for his wife, if he sees her as primarily a tool for child bearing.

Mojohowitz November 20, 2013 at 11:23 pm

While I also feel sorry for his wife on many levels. he is the biggest tool in the equation.

Heyim1also November 20, 2013 at 10:18 am

Rick Santorum is an asshole.. and if you think like he does…guess what ? .. You're an asshole too !

Alex_Parrish November 20, 2013 at 11:00 am

For a moment let me speak in the language of the church which Santorum *might* understand: ALL have fallen short and are in the need of the mercy of a loving god. Based on Santorum's understanding of this and the way he applies it to LGBT couples, then NO ONE should be married — gay or straight — all have fallen short of god's design and live in a state of sinfulness. LGBT people are no more or no less sinful than straight people. Period.

I don't exactly buy-into that jargon theologically, but if you do, then you must follow that logic and say that no one is worth in the eyes of god to be married.

In other terms: Don't let the perfect be the enemy of the good.

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