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Instant Noodles Make You Gay – and 9 Other Crazy Conservative Conspiracy Theories on Sexuality

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Instant noodles, tattoos, going to prison and more. Here are some of the top things that conservatives have claimed turn people gay.

The mayor of the Indonesian city of Tangerang – which has a population of over two million – recently attended a city-run pregnancy seminar where he claimed that milk formula and instant noodles could make babies gay. Now let’s just be clear, there is absolutely no scientific evidence whatsoever that instant noodles will make men start craving manly noodles; however that didn’t stop Mayor Arief R Wismansyah from making the absurd accusation. Believe it or not, instant noodles is just one of the many whacky gay conspiracy theories conservatives have concocted out of thin air.

Because of this, I decided to round up a few of my favorites and share them with you below. Here are nine, incredibly ridiculous ways you can turn gay according to various religious and/or conservative nut jobs.

1.) Prison – While Ben Carson was campaigning to be the next republican presidential nominee, CNN asked him if he thought homosexuality was a choice. “Absolutely,” he replied. “Because a lot of people who go into prison go into prison straight — and when they come out, they’re gay.” This is from the same man who claimed that the pyramids were not tombs, but rather ancient grain storage units built by Joseph.

2.) Juice Boxes – Look out soccer moms! You better think twice before handing you kids a refreshing juice box after practice. According to radio show host and conspiracy theory king Alex jones, the reason there are so many gay people now is because the government wants to encourage homosexuality with chemicals so that people don’t have children. How are these chemicals being distributed? Juice boxes of course!

3.) Tattoos – Mallam Ya Wadudu, a leading spiritualist in the West African nation of Ghana, said that getting a tattoo could unknowingly make a person beholden to spirits which would then punish them by pushing them into things like homosexuality, alcoholism, prostitution or stealing.

4.) Standardized School Testing – Florida State Rep. Charles Van Zant (R) once spoke at the “Operation Education Conference” in Orlando, and warned that officials implementing Common Core (academic standards in mathematics and English language arts/literacy) were trying to promote the LGBT agenda. He claimed Common Core was determined to “attract every one of your children to become as homosexual as they possibly can.”

5.) Disney’s ‘Frozen’ – In a radio broadcast, Pastor Kevin Swanson said, “I wonder if people are thinking, ‘You know, I think this cute little movie is going to indoctrinate my 5-year-old to be a lesbian or treat homosexuality or bestiality in a light sort of way.’ I wonder if the average parent going to see ‘Frozen’ is thinking that way.”

Whackadoo author, Kathryn Skaggs, agreed that the animated film promoted homosexuality to children. “I could blatantly see that the homosexual agenda, to normalize the practice, was not simply an underlying message in the movie ‘Frozen,’ but is the actual story,” she said.

6.) Eating Chicken – Back in 2010, Bolivian President Evo Morales spoke at an environmental conference in Cochabamba where he claimed that hormones in chicken cause homosexuality and baldness. Columbian model, Natalia Paris, also jumped on the “chicken makes you gay” bandwagon. Who knew it was a thing?

7.) Eating Tofu – Religious author, Jim Rutz, went on a rant back in 2006 claiming that soy was the reason your children are turning into homosexuals.

“Soy is feminizing, and commonly leads to a decrease in the size of the penis, sexual confusion and homosexuality,” he said. “That’s why most of the medical (not socio-spiritual) blame for today’s rise in homosexuality must fall upon the rise in soy formula and other soy products. (Most babies are bottle-fed during some part of their infancy, and one-fourth of them are getting soy milk!) Homosexuals often argue that their homosexuality is inborn because “I can’t remember a time when I wasn’t homosexual.” No, homosexuality is always deviant. But now many of them can truthfully say that they can’t remember a time when excess estrogen wasn’t influencing them.”

8.) Doritos – These chips “make the perfect gateway snack to introduce children to the joys of homosexuality,” according to conservative blogger Ed Straker. He went on to say, “I think we should push other companies to launch pro-heterosexual campaigns.  Perhaps we could persuade a hot dog maker and a hot dog bun company to do a joint effort promoting man-woman relationships.”

9.) Dancing – A group of men were arrested last year by Saudi Arabia’s morality police for dancing at a birthday party. An official urged parents to monitor this kind of behavior “because it can lead to immorality and even homosexuality.”

Those are the top conspiracy theories for why people turn gay. Let us know which one is your favorite in the comments section below. Also, if you know of any we missed, we’d love to hear about those too!

 

Image by Takeaway via Wikimedia

 

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‘I Feel So Bad for Him’: George Conway Trolls Trump Amid White House Attack

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Longtime Never-Trump critic turned Democratic congressional candidate George Conway is mocking President Donald Trump in a campaign video and a social media post while the White House targets him in a highly critical attack.

“Hi, Donald, it’s me, George Conway,” Conway, a conservative attorney, says in his video. “I cost you 88 f —— million dollars, and I’ve only just gotten started.”

“I know you like putting your name on everything from your plane to the Kennedy Center,” he continues. “But the only thing your name is gonna be left on when I’m done with you is the orange jumpsuit you’re going to have to wear in prison.”

“And you see that building back there?” he says over an image of Congress. “That’s where we’re gonna hold your third and final impeachment trial. The one that’s gonna put you away for good. And I’m gonna enjoy every minute of that.”

“We’ve got a lot of serious problems in this country, including, and especially, the price of gas — which is hitting $6 a gallon in some places, and that’s all because of you, Donald Trump. We can’t fix those problems until we impeach you and convict you. And that’s why I’m running for Congress.”

In a statement to Fox News, the White House blasted Conway.

“Lightweight George Conway is a stupid person’s idea of a smart person,” a spokesperson said. “His severe and debilitating disease known as Trump Derangement syndrome has melted his brain and made him crazy in the head.”

Conway is a co-founder of The Lincoln Project and was considered for a post as Trump’s Solicitor General at the start of his first administration. Conway withdrew his name from consideration.

On social media, Conway further mocked President Trump.

“Here’s our TV ad that poor wittle Donnie (@realDonaldTrump) didn’t wike and had to compwain to Fox ‘News’ about,” Conway wrote. “Sad! I feel so bad for him.”

Conway is running for a reliably blue seat in Manhattan.

“Conway, who previously lived in Bethesda, Md., before launching his congressional campaign, faces an uphill battle in the race for the heavily Democratic seat vacated by longtime Rep. Jerrold Nadler, D-N.Y., who is retiring,” Fox News reported.

Earlier this year, Conway warned, “The way things are going in America, it should be clear we don’t have much time.”

“We certainly don’t have three years,” he said in February. “We need to help ourselves by pushing for impeachment and removal as hard as we can and carrying it out as soon as humanly possible.”

 

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A Letter From Florida Has a Blunt Verdict on the MAGA Movement: It’s ‘Dying’

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The Villages in Florida, the largest retirement community in the world, has been home to an extremely active MAGA movement. Roughly seven out of ten county residents voted for Trump in 2024, and its MAGA golf cart parades are legendary.

But Sunday’s parade was sparsely attended, according to a letter to the editor in The Villages News, which declares that the MAGA movement there is “dying.”

Casey Marr writes that they arrived at President Donald Trump’s 80th birthday golf cart parade, found many open parking spaces “and only a few people milling around” 30 minutes before the starting time. At 1:00 p.m., the official start time, “there was certainly no big crowd of cheering people” to welcome the parade of golf carts, which numbered only about 100 and lasted just 20 minutes.

Marr explains that there were two smaller starting places, and says that even if they had a similar number of carts, there would only have been “a pitiful 303.”

“This was advertised as a Guinness World Record challenge,” Marr says. “The record was set on Sept. 4, 2005, here in The Villages with 3,321 golf carts.”

According to Newsweek, Trump’s approval in Florida is 13 points underwater. Nationwide, Trump is 23 points underwater.

“Several states that began his term in positive territory, including Florida, Ohio and Texas, are now net negative,” Newsweek noted. “Deep-red states still form Trump’s strongest base, but many of those margins have narrowed sharply since January 2025.”

The golf cart parade fell short of the record, but Marr notes that The Villages’ “No Kings” rallies have grown “exponentially.” The “latest had two locations with attendance close to 6,000.”

“There is now a ‘Leaving MAGA’ billboard here on U.S. Hwy. 441,” Marr writes. “The ‘Trump 47’ website is down. The MAGA Club almost never holds any events. You almost never see a Trump flag flying anymore.”

Trump, Marr charges, “is using the office to line his pockets. Started a war which spiked gas prices along with everything else. Inflation and unemployment are rising. Aligned himself with murderous war criminals like Putin. He continues to protect pedophilia. This weekend he is desecrating the White House by holding a fighting match like Caligula being entertained by gladiators. The list of horrific things being done, especially in this administration, is endless. And he’s even lost former stalwarts like Marjorie Taylor Greene and Tucker Carlson.”

“Yes,” Marr declares, “MAGA is dying in the country and even here. Florida is purple now again and turning bluer daily.”

 

Image via Reuters 

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Red State Democrats Sound 2026 Warning Over ‘Trump Derangement Syndrome’

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Democratic candidates running in red states and hoping to flip districts are warning against “Trump Derangement Syndrome,” the president’s and his supporters’ name for reflexive anti-Trump sentiment.

“Arguing about Donald Trump, somebody people voted for probably three times, isn’t going to be very conducive to getting things accomplished or reaching some common ground,” Kansas farmer and veterinarian Don Coover, challenging an incumbent GOP congressman in a deep-red district, told Bloomberg Government. Coover “said his party has to dial back the national rhetoric if it wants to compete in Trump-friendly places.”

Andrew Sneed, who is challenging a GOP incumbent congressman in a deep red Alabama district, told Bloomberg, “If we make this election about President Trump in my district and in districts like this around the country, we’re going to lose.”

Democrats hope to retake the House majority, and have targeted 25 GOP-held seats.

U.S. Rep. Tom Suozzi (D-NY) urged Democrats to focus on the issues, such as affordability, and not on Donald Trump.

“It’s less about him than the fact that he’s not paying attention to the issue of affordability,” Suozzi told Bloomberg. “It’s not about Trump. It’s not about Trump derangement syndrome, and it’s not about his sometimes interesting behavior. It’s about policies that affect peoples’ lives.”

U.S. Rep. Laura Gillen, a vulnerable New York Democrat who is being targeted by the House GOP’s campaign arm, “said she is focused on touting her bipartisan work across the aisle, keeping Trump’s name at bay.”

“My messaging has been focused on what I am doing to try and make life more affordable,” Gillen told Bloomberg. “I ran for Congress and said I’d work with anyone from any party to get things done.”

Some warn that campaigning against Trump directly could backfire, especially should the president’s low approval numbers rebound.

Bloomberg notes that Republicans are targeting 29 Democrats, including 23 incumbents who represent voters in districts Trump won.

Democratic incumbents and candidates have stated their messaging plainly. The Republican National Committee is  accusing them of “TDS.”

“Voters want secure borders, lower prices, safer communities, and a strong economy, not Trump Derangement Syndrome,” RNC spokesperson Kiersten Pels said in a statement. “Americans are seeing through the Democrats’ tired strategy of attacking and vilifying President Trump and his supporters.”

 

Image via Reuters 

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