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‘Put the Elf Back on the Shelf’: Internet Mocks News That Jeff Sessions Might Run for His Old Senate Seat

On Monday, Politico reported that former Attorney General Jeff Sessions is considering a run for his old Senate seat in Alabama — a move that would push him hard up against the filing deadline, throw him into an already-crowded primary that includes fired judge and accused pedophile Roy Moore and football coach Tommy Tuberville, and potentially draw opposition from President Donald Trump.
Whatever the political implications of the decision, commenters on social media had a field day, ruthlessly mocking Sessions:
— Copernicus Turing (@CopernicusTur) October 29, 2019
I for one can’t wait to see @DougJones put the elf back on the shelf.
— Special Agent Utah (@PonceDeNeon404) October 28, 2019
Jeff Sessions helped turn Alabama into the booming and bustling United Nations-designated third world state that it is today.https://t.co/1JozH79SVl
— 🕷️spider 🕸️web rant 😱 (@web_rant) October 29, 2019
Can’t wait for “Recused himself from the Russia investigation” to be used *against* him in the primary 😂🤣
— Neo, Liberal Corporate Sellout (@HotTakesBun) October 29, 2019
Campaign slogan: NOT the worst AG in history any more!
— Alt-D.J.T.- history’s most hunted witch (@alternateDT) October 29, 2019
Roy Moore vs Jeff Sessions.. It’s like civil war inception going down in Alabama.. only twist is that both sides are white supremacists
— Calling Out Liars (@OuttingLiars) October 28, 2019
It tells me the AL GOP doesn’t feel confident it can stop Roy Moore.
— Blank Slate (@blankslate2017) October 29, 2019
lol Alabama is so bad that Reanimated Jeff Sessions is an upgrade from their last candidate
— My Own Echo Chamber (@MineEchoChamber) October 28, 2019
Keeblers gotta keeb
— 🧟♀️ Casey Friday the 13th 🧟♂️ (@CaseyFrid) October 29, 2019
Dancing With the Stars wouldn’t let Jeff Sessions on?
— BarrDeceivesForTrump (@darinp2) October 29, 2019
What? In a surprising twist, the writers are bringing back characters from Season One!!! OMG!!!!
— Burt Macklin (@knoweyedentity) October 29, 2019
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