Garrison Keillor Just Wrote the Most Awesome Take Down of Donald Trump You Will Ever Read

‘When This Is Over, You Will Have Nothing That You Want’

Garrison Keillor just wrote the most awesome take down of Donald Trump you will ever read. Creator of “A Prairie Home Companion,” the beloved Minnesota Public Radio show he hosted from 1974 until retiring earlier this year, Keillor knows how to turn a phrase better than almost anyone.

In his exquisite op-ed, “When This Is Over, You Will Have Nothing That You Want,” Keillor destroys Trump, from the Manhattan billionaire’s very core.

“The cap does not look good on you, it’s a duffer’s cap, and when you come to the microphone, you look like the warm-up guy, the guy who announces the license number of the car left in the parking lot, doors locked, lights on, motor running,” Keillor begins, clearly talking directly to Trump. “The brim shadows your face, which gives a sinister look, as if you’d come to town to announce the closing of the pulp factory. Your eyes look dead and your scowl does not suggest American greatness so much as American indigestion. Your hair is the wrong color: People don’t want a president to be that shade of blond. You know that now.”

Keillor’s ultimate take down continues, mocking Trump as if he’s lived inside his head since the billionaire businessman was a small boy. He slams Trump with his own inner turmoil.

“The New York Times treats you like the village idiot. This is painful for a Queens boy trying to win respect in Manhattan where the Times is the Supreme Liberal Jewish Anglican Arbiter of Who Has The Smarts and What Goes Where. When you came to Manhattan 40 years ago, you discovered that in entertainment, the press, politics, finance, everywhere you went, you ran into Jews, and they are not like you: Jews didn’t go in for big yachts and a fleet of aircraft — they showed off by way of philanthropy or by raising brilliant offspring. They sympathized with the civil rights movement. In Queens, blacks were a threat to property values — they belonged in the Bronx, not down the street. To the Times, Queens is Cleveland. Bush league. You are Queens.”

Read the entire op-ed. Maybe tweet it to @RealDonaldTrump.

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Image by Becky McCray via Flickr and a CC license