GOP Convention Full Speakers List Features Trump, Duck Dynasty Dude, and Almost No One Anyone Knows

GOP Convention Will Be a Joke: Part III

The Republican National Convention kicks off Monday afternoon and in typical Donald Trump fashion the full, final, official list of speakers wasn’t announced until Sunday night. There’s little question as to why, as it appears to have been thrown together at the last minute. And while what’s more notable than the names of people refusing to not only speak but even attend, the headliners Donald Trump has chosen speak volumes about what the soon-to-be Republican nominee for president thinks of what good management looks like, and what it takes to deliver results.

Not speaking of course are anyone named Bush, including either of the Presidents Bush, or the former Governor Bush. Neither is former GOP VP nominee and Trump surrogate Sarah Palin. Or, despite Trump’s promise, Tom Brady. Or, despite Trump’s promise, Tim Tebow.

Or, despite Trump’s promise, Boxing promoter Don King.

Why?

Curiously, Mike Huckabee who was on the original released list, is missing from the final list.

So who will be speaking?

True to form, in a stunning departure from previous conventions, Trump will be speaking on the first night of the convention, as well as on the last, to accept the nomination. Yes, it will be The Donald Trump Show.

The four day event is organized around variations of Trump’s signature “Make America Great Again” campaign rhetoric.

Monday: Make America Safe Again
Tuesday: Make America Work Again
Wednesday: Make America First Again
Thursday: Make America One Again

Who does Donald Trump think should inform GOP voters about how to “Make America Safe Again”? 

“Willie Robertson, CEO of Duck Commander and Buck Commander, star of Duck Dynasty
The star of A&E’s hit series Duck Dynasty, Willie Robertson, is the CEO of Duck Commander and Buck Commander, a New York Times bestselling author, traveling speaker, father of five, and an avid outdoorsman.”

Who else knows about how to “Make America Safe Again”? 

“Scott Baio, Actor and Television Producer
Scott Baio is an actor and television producer. He landed his first starring role in the 1976 movie Bugsy Malone and is known for portraying memorable characters on several hit television shows, including Happy Days, Joanie Loves Chachi, and Charles In Charge. More recently, he has appeared in the Emmy Award-winning show Arrested Development and the Nick at Nite comedy See Dad Run, which he also produces. When he was young, Baio campaigned for Ronald Reagan, and in the 2016 GOP primary, he endorsed presumptive nominee Donald Trump.”

“Antonio Sabato, Jr., Actor
Daytime television viewers know actor Antonio Sabato Jr. for his roles on General Hospital and The Bold and the Beautiful.”

Others included on the “Make America Safe Again” list include:

Pat Smith, Mother of Benghazi victim, Sean Smith
Mark Geist, U.S. Marine Corps veteran, Fought in Battle of Benghazi
John Tiegen, U.S. Marine Corps veteran, Fought in Battle of Benghazi
U.S. Senator Tom Cotton (R-Arkansas)
Governor Rick Perry, Former Governor of Texas
Rudy Giuliani, Former Mayor of New York City
Melania Trump, Businesswoman and Wife of Donald Trump

How about “Make America Work Again”? 

“Dana White, President, UFC
Dana White is the president and business visionary behind the success of Ultimate Fighting Championship (UFC). A self-described political independent, White has expressed his gratitude to presumptive Republican nominee Donald Trump for helping the UFC succeed. Trump hosted the once-controversial mixed martial arts competitions at his Trump Taj Mahal casino property when other venues shunned the sport.”

“Andy Wist, Businessman
Andy Wist founded the Standard Waterproofing Company in 1979. Beginning in his mom’s basement in Brooklyn, Andy grew the company into one of the largest roofing, waterproofing, and landmark restoration companies in New York City, that today counts more than 180 employees and is headquartered in the Bronx.”

“Tiffany Trump, Daughter of Donald Trump
Tiffany Trump was born October 13, 1993 to Donald Trump and Marla Maples. Raised in California, she is the second-youngest of Donald Trump’s children. Tiffany graduated from University of Pennsylvania this spring with a double major in sociology and urban studies. She is a fashion model, singer, and influential presence on social media.”

Others include:

Chris Cox, Executive Director of NRA Institute for Legislative Action
Natalie Gulbis, Golfer, LPGA
U.S. Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Kentucky)
U.S. Speaker of the House Paul Ryan (WI-1)
Governor Chris Christie, Governor of New Jersey
Dr. Ben Carson, Neurosurgeon

That’s just the first two days. It doesn’t get any better, or more credible as the convention wears on. 

But the message is clear. If you’re a Trump family member, or work for Trump, you may be speaking at the convention. If you owe Trump something, you may be speaking at the convention. 

If you’re a credible expert on the topic of the day you’re probably not speaking.

And if your name is Donald Trump, the 2016 Republican National Convention is all about you.

 

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GOP Convention Promises to Be a Joke: Part II – Trump Camp Says Tim Tebow Speaking, Tebow Says No