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Christian Attorney Trying To Marry His MacBook

Suing Texas for Not Allowing Him to Wed the Object of His Desire – Actually Just Absurd Attack on Same-Sex Marriage

Tennessee attorney Chris Sevier is suing Texas Gov. Greg Abbott, the Harris County District Clerk, and Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton for not letting him marry his 2011 Macbook. It is, of course, an absurd case designed as a protest against same-sex marriage. 

Sevier is a “Christian who makes his living producing electronic music,” the Houston Chronicle reports. He “insists he is not being silly or satirical in his quest. He said he believes ‘the Constitution is being hijacked’ by giving same-sex couples the right to marry.”

This is not Sevier’s first ridiculous lawsuit. He’s filed similar lawsuits in other states, and in 2014 even tried to sue Apple for because they allowed his computer to access porn, then sued Florida for not allowing him to marry that laptop which he says he loves.

Sevier claimed that after buying a laptop without porn filters, he became addicted to pornography, “fell in love” with his computer, and preferred “having sex with it over all other persons or things.”

If gay people “have the right to marry their object of sexual desire, even if they lack corresponding sexual parts,” he said, “then I should have the right to marry my preferred sexual object.”

The Houston Press says, “Sevier isn’t trying to marry his laptop. He is trying to destroy marriages and families across the country. We asked him if he was okay with that, and he said yes.”

“The question is, should we have policies that encourage that kind of lifestyle?” Sevier said. “The state is not doing anyone any favors by encouraging people to live that lifestyle. We have to define marriage.”

Sevier, who is committed to finding a court that will allow his case to proceed, has plan to sue in 12 more states. He says his lawsuit “is not a matter of who’s on the right side of history.”

“This is about who is on the right side of reality. Are we just delusional?”

 

Image by Milind Alvares via Flickr and a CC license

 

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