I was on my way to class when I got the email. It was a normal day like any other: near the end of senior year, and I was itching to finish up the next two weeks of college and graduate. My BA! The future! The whole world was open to me. So, when I got the email from our Dean of Students, I promptly deleted it. You see, it had become practice at my (relatively small, liberal arts) school to receive an email from the DoS if a student passed away during the year. There were really no other reasons why that particular email would show up in my inbox. And I wasn’t interested, in this, the second-to-last week of classes, in reading some sob story about a girl I hadn’t known passing away. I just wanted to get on with my day.
So I don’t know what prompted me to retrieve the email from my trash and read it before leaving. Maybe it was curiosity — if a friend of a friend had passed, I’d likely hear about it. I couldn’t have possibly expected that it would be about a friend of mine. But, it was. A good friend. One whom I’d – almost, briefly – been more than friends with.
What struck me about her aside from her constantly upbeat attitude, was her need to create social change. Everywhere she went, she was interacting with the top of feminist scholarship – Steinem, Hillary Clinton, and more were regularly interacting with her, and she strove to make a difference with everything she did.
However, sadly, she didn’t feel she had a personal voice — she never felt completely comfortable coming out. It is the memory of this dear friend that inspired me to approach my friend and collaborator, C.C. Webster, to write a script that reflects both her struggle with identity and my own grief of having lost such an endearing individual.
The resulting script, “Gone,” is a touching and contemplative character piece that resonates with anyone who has lost a loved one. With this film, I’m striving to leave not just a personal memorial, but a legacy – that of being honest, of being open, and of being genuine with those around you.
In “Gone,” we meet Pen, played by Sandha Khin, who is a young woman trying to park her car on the way to a meeting that has her nervous. She receives a phone call from her mom, who reassures her that everything will be fine. Pen parks and heads over to a lemonade stand, where she meets Marcus, a young graphic designer who works in the area. They engage in some small talk before revealing their shared history: both Marcus and Pen at one time had dated Jimmy, a young man who has recently died in a car accident.
Pen still hasn’t dealt with her personal issues over Jimmy coming out as gay, nor has she recovered fully from his recent passing. Marcus, too, struggles with how to deal with Jimmy’s death, understanding that Pen still hasn’t fully recovered from losing her past love. Marcus gives Pen a keepsake left behind by Jimmy, which, in some small sense, brings her closure.
As a member of the LGBT community, some of the things I’ve struggled with aren’t just about the lack of representation of queer characters in film and television, but the fact that, when we do look at those representations, it’s not always written, directed, or acted with honesty.
This statement isn’t made with the intent of casting aspersions. I know the community is one big glass house, and I hope to work alongside others to keep it standing. What matters with this project is, rather, the idea that queer people are three-dimensional individuals — that the LGBT community is not defined entirely by our sexuality. (Marcus is, after all, a graphic designer, drives a Prius, and grieves over a lost love.)
A major goal with this film is to reach audiences beyond just the standard queer-filmmaker and queer-film-watcher audience. “Boys Don’t Cry” wouldn’t have rocketed Hilary Swank to fame had straight viewers not championed the film along with the LGBT community. In every civil rights movement, it’s been important to include the perspectives and the aid of allies of the community. Here, I seek to do the same.
Art can liberate peoples’ perspectives in ways that activism cannot. By depicting homosexuals dealing with universal problems, not just LGBT problems, “Gone” will bridge the humanity of two worlds while upholding the importance of being true to yourself and embracing your identity.
My last film, “Snapshot,” played at the Palm Springs Film Festival, Outfest, Melbourne Queer Film Festival, image+nation in Montreal, and I won second place at the Las Vegas Cinefest script competition.
With “Gone,” I aspire to attract the eyes of all cinephiles. I am hoping to bring this film to the bigger mainstream festivals so that our message of equality gets as much visibility as possible. In order for our message to be heard, and in order for that message to make a difference, the film must be produced to the standard that the script deserves. Too often with LGBT films, the budgetary constraints lead to unpolished productions which virtually disqualify them from being accepted in to influential film festivals. When they are only accepted in to LGBT niche festivals, the films only preach to the choir.
So we are turning to the LGBT community to help us raise the funds to make something with the production value to truly stand out. I really want this film to act as a universally accepting message that anyone, regardless of sexual orientation, can connect to. I believe “Gone” has the propensity to build bridges and attract positive artistic attention both within and outside the LGBT community.
Please watch our video and consider contributing to a film that wants to make a difference.
http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1994266099/gone-a-short-film-about-loss-identity-and-moving-o/widget/video.html
Included in our perks is the ability make a dedication to someone you love or have lost. “Gone” is ultimately a film about grief and finding the strength to move on and we hope you’ll find meaning in this option.
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Miranda Sajdak (Producer/Director)
Miranda Sajdak is a graduate of the Columbia University Film Studies program. She has worked for many years in productions in both New York and Los Angeles. Recent projects include work on ABC Family’s Huge as assistant to Winnie Holzman, work on Cloverfield, The Bourne Ultimatum, and as Assistant Director for the Elle: Make Better DVD series starring Brooklyn Decker. She recently won 2nd prize in the Las Vegas Cinefest screenwriting competition for her short film Santa Baby. Her last short, Snapshot, which she co-produced, wrote, and directed, played at both Outfest and Palm Springs, among other festivals throughout the world. See Miranda Sajdak’s full list of credits.