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The State Of The Union Is We’re Tea Party Screwed

by Jean Ann Esselink on February 12, 2013

in Arts,Farce,Jean Ann Esselink,News

Post image for The State Of The Union Is We’re Tea Party Screwed

 THE STATE OF THE UNION IS WE’RE TEA PARTY SCREWED

“From time to time,”
The Constitution demands,
The President give congress,
“Information” on the land.
But if he’s honest ‘bout our status,
He will surely be booed.
Because the State of our Union is,
We’re Tea Party Screwed.

Republicans have torn themselves,
Apart at the seams.
There’s a caucus that’s pro-money.
And a caucus that’s pro-mean.
Every time the Speaker compromised,
The baggers refused.
So the State of the Union is,
We’re Tea Party screwed.

Our economy is trying,
Very hard to bounce back.
Housing is improving,
And the market’s on track.
Still they won’t take up a jobs bill,
In their ”Fuck Obama” mood.
So the state of our Union is,
We’re Tea Party screwed.

The War on Women rages on,
Fulfilling bold predictions,
That the states would end abortion,
Through impossible restrictions.
And The Please-Don’t-Hit-Your-Women Act,
Still hasn’t been renewed.
Because the State of the Union is,
We’re Tea Party screwed,

Gays are now allowed to join,
The wars this country fights.
Just don’t ask for on-base housing,
‘Cause you have no married rights.
The House still clings to DOMA,
And since that’s their attitude,
The State of the Union is,
We’re Tea Party screwed.

Gabbby Giffords took a headshot,
Still they won’t restrict guns.
Shoot babies in their classrooms?
They say nothing can be done.
It’s no secret that our congress,
And the NRA collude.
Which means the State of The Union is,
We’re Tea Party screwed.

Eleven million of our neighbors,
Don’t have papers for this nation.
They’ve been waiting 20 years,
To hear a plan for immigration.
But the House turned down the Dream Act,
Where kids would have been excused.
So the State of the Union is,
We’re Tea Party screwed.

They’ll send disaster aid to Tupelo,
But not to Jersey City.
There are climate change deniers,
On the House Science Committee.
Free contraception in Obamacare!
The Right came unglued.
That means the State of the Union is,
We’re Tea Party screwed.

We’re now fracking solid ground,
We’ve got drones up in the heavens.
We haven’t had a budget passed,
Since back 2007.
Sequester didn’t work,
To cure the partisan feud.
So the State of the Union is,
We’re Tea Party Screwed.

Tonight Barack Obama,
Goes once more into the breach.
But don’t be late to tune him in,
You might just miss his speech.
Because there’s really just one sentiment,
That needs to be imbued.
The State of the Union is,
We’re Tea Party screwed.

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tncrmJean Ann Esselink is a straight friend to the gay community. Proud and loud Liberal. Closet writer of political fiction. Black sheep agnostic Democrat from a conservative Catholic family. Living in Northern Oakland County Michigan with Puck the Wonder Beagle. Follow me on Twitter as @Uncucumbered or friend me on Facebook.

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If you are a fan of political verse, try my Inauguration Day Ode to Mitt Romney: That’s Why We’re Not Inaugurating You.

And my annual Fight Before Christmas Parody

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