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GOP Senator Pushing ‘Emergency’ Bill To Make Oral Sex Between High School Students A Felony

by David Badash on January 9, 2014

in Bigotry Watch,Discrimination,News,Politics

Post image for GOP Senator Pushing ‘Emergency’ Bill To Make Oral Sex Between High School Students A Felony

Apparently, there’s an emergency in the great state of Virginia. High school students are having too much oral and anal sex, and it’s time to start throwing them in prison for it — making them felons for the rest of their lives.

So says Virginia Republican state senator Thomas A. Garrett, who was unsurprisingly endorsed by failed former Attorney General and gubernatorial candidate Ken Cuccinelli.

Garrett is attempting to resurrect Virginia’s “crimes against nature” statute. Cuccinelli, as Virginia’s AG, tried to convince the U.S. Supreme Court that the law was both necessary or constitutional. He failed.

Of course, the goal behind the bill is to make sex between two people of the same gender more consequential. The bill does not make penile-vaginal sex between minors a felony, because that’s not a “crime against nature.”

Josh Israel at Think Progress notes that “under Virginia law, anyone who encourages or asks another to commit a felony is automatically guilty of a felony. As such, while an adult having consensual vaginal intercourse with a 16- or 17-year-old would be a misdemeanor, an adult simply asking a 17-year-old for oral sex would be a Class 5 felony.”

Israel adds that “Virginia law permits heterosexual 16 or 17 years old to marry,”  but under “Garrett’s bill, two 17-year-olds could be legally wed but would both become felons if they engaged in oral sex — or even suggested doing so.”

And with Virginia’s marriage inequality constitutional amendment, a 17-year-old same-sex couple would not only be unable to marry, but would each be guilty of a felony if they engaged in any sexual relations at all.

That “emergency” part?

The bill’s language claims “an emergency exists and this act is in force from its passage.”


Image via Thomas A. Garrett’s Facebook page

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BeerandOnion January 9, 2014 at 10:09 am

Republicans don't care about education or health care, but they are sure willing to put people in prison for almost any reason. What is it with the GOP? Are they all mini-dictators?

RRuinsky January 9, 2014 at 10:27 am

Considering this idiot is posing in front of what appears to be a barn I want an investigation into who or what he's having sex with. There's the real emergency.

david0296 January 9, 2014 at 10:38 am

I'm willing to wager that he and Cuccinelli are self-loathing closet cases that are trying to prove to everyone that they're straight. So they keep trying to pass these anti-gay laws. But their obsessiveness about all-things homosexual is their downfall. Yet they're too stupid to realize it.

Doc January 11, 2014 at 3:13 am

How many times have we as a society seen people like this, who push super hard to pass some legislation designed to punish homosexuals or pedophiles, only to find out some months or even weeks later that the sponsor of such a bill is actually having anal and oral sex with high school students or little boys?

I think Mr. Garrett needs to be looked at very closely

VespulaMaculata January 12, 2014 at 3:59 pm

I agree. Both of them remind of the pre-fall, finger-wagging Ted Haggard in "Jesus Camp" warning 'God knows what you were doing last night…'

xenubarb January 9, 2014 at 11:26 am

I think Virginia needs a new state motto. It sure the hell isn't for "lovers." That's false advertising on license plates!

Heyim1also January 9, 2014 at 11:50 am

Who keeps turning over the rocks ?

Mykelbarber January 9, 2014 at 12:01 pm

Authoritarian fascist assholes.

pjbarton404 January 9, 2014 at 1:50 pm

what a creep why is he being paid ?

daguedawg January 9, 2014 at 2:01 pm

Garbage like this shows how power mad these freaks can be. Who knows? Maybe his daughter gave some kid a blow job and it got around school…so instead of taking care of the nation's business he uses his power to try to lash out at kids who take advantage of his daughter.

peterblaise January 10, 2014 at 3:00 pm

… you mean prevent kids from NATURALLY getting their meds without paying big pharma for SYNTHETIC ACTS AGAINST NATURE?

Semen can cure depression

Apparently semen contains chemicals that elevate mood, increase affection, induce sleep, and contain at least three antidepressants.

It also contains:

– cortisol, which is known to increase affection; as well as

– estrone, which elevates mood;

– oxytocin, which also elevates mood;

– thyrotropin-releasing hormone, which is another antidepressant;

– melatonin, which is a sleep aid; and

– serotonin, which is a well-known antidepressant neurotransmitter.

Typical Republican protection of big business versus the little people.

Doc January 11, 2014 at 3:12 am

And yet I feel 100% better when I get rid of some of my semen.

nolarch45 January 9, 2014 at 3:21 pm

Hey, Garrett. Suck my d**k, or, better yet, stick it up your a**.

lorimakes January 9, 2014 at 4:50 pm

Oh now I get it. He's from freakin' Bumpass. (Have fun with that.)

It's a typical country area except for a really big lake with really big houses around it. So poor rednecks and retired Northern Virginia rich conservatives. That explains everything.

James_M_Martin January 9, 2014 at 7:33 pm

One supposes it's evil of Big Government to perpetuate bureaucracies, including those involved in oversight, and they must be threatened with abolition because Americans don't want Big Brother meddling in our business and political affairs, but good of Big Government to punish a segment of the population because your Buy Bull tells you they're sinning, Big Brother meddling in our bedrooms.

Derek Williams January 9, 2014 at 10:00 pm

That, plus opposing every single LGBT rights ordinance and denying Americans universal healthcare sum up Republican priorities.

Sandra January 9, 2014 at 10:04 pm

I'm betting he couldn't get a blow job in High School, so….

jsm11482 January 10, 2014 at 12:04 pm

When our representatives sponsor bills like this, they should be fired.

konkrypton January 12, 2014 at 4:42 pm

I find it interesting that conservatives find oral/anal sex “unnatural” but Christ’s resurrection is perfectly normal. They have a weird definition of "natural," it seems to me.

peterblaise January 12, 2014 at 11:18 pm

Hey, Republicans pushed (!) to have trans-vaginal sonograms pushed up women's yahoos before abortions, so they have no problem with "unnatural" when it suits their purposes — nothing more unnatural than a Republican, I say.

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